Life is never easy, especially once we feel the breath of death chasing us while we struggle to avoid getting swallowed by time’s ever warping speed into the abyss of that unknown – THAT unknown.
Lately, my mind has been tasked to come up with ways to diminish the sweat, the racing heartbeat, and the gasp of breathlessness from “upon realizing that life might NOT continue in the pattern I’m now used to” or that my fancies and daydreams, those pseudo-expectations wrapped in the fluff of fantasy…. might not turn out as or into what I expected. You know, sort of like when you thought that stain would come out after laundering, but what you pick up from the dryer is now a heat-seared stain on a somewhat burnt white blouse. What seems to help me in these situations… beyond imagining the worst case scenario and intellectually attempting to determine that even that would NOT be unbearable, hence – anything less is just fine…. is to simply recognize that regardless of the good or bad spin, any change offers an opportunity to rework ourselves, to redirect my remaining time and to recreate the story of who I am (was) and what I did in life.
All change causes psycho-emotional (forgive me for glibly throwing around possible technical professional terminology – but it seems to me that these are being thrown about by everyone) challenge or strain – call it stress. But I can see the purpose of stress as being a means to make corrections or connections or to break away from harmful scenarios… any way I look at it; stress is what we talk about when we say, “whatever doesn’t kill me makes me stronger”. It is in stretching that we increase our flexibility, in making adjustments that we learn to adjust ourselves, and in recovering that we learn to recover all the more. The only real question is whether or not we give in to our weaker natures and allow ourselves to become victims of life’s ebb and flow, or currents and raging storms… Do I curl up and lay down to await fate or do I expend energy in battle and blame or do I begin to prepare for alternate outcomes by mentally and emotionally rehearsing them and envisioning HOW I might pave a different path (or a few) than the one I dreamt when I walked on the path I’m on right now.
No one can decide but me – and for now, until a more ill-feeling day comes along, I am recreating the dreams I had. Time is ever shorter… let me dream fast and true – as I take my next shot at the target before me – the worthy life… But on a day when I feel emotionally, physically, or mentally more grey or ill – I will not shame or blame myself for NOT putting on the armor of ardor. Then I will simply pray for enough time to step back on the path of life before the road runs out before me.
- I Don’t Get It. March 2, 2022
- Challenges are but revisions to the stories we will tell… September 15, 2019
- Happiness is… August 27, 2019
- I’m not really a “good” friend August 27, 2019
- What Happens When August 21, 2019
Make your own kind of music